


If We Go Down Then We Go Down Together

by arthurpendragonz



Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Arthur's POV, Betrayal, First Kiss, First Time, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Misunderstandings, Mutual Pining, Romance, Undercover Missions, detective!Arthur, liberal use of swear words, spy!merlin, warlock!merlin
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-01-19
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-18 16:11:52
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,207
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9392846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/arthurpendragonz/pseuds/arthurpendragonz
Summary: Arthur is tasked by Uther with bringing down the most active group of sorcerer's Camelot has seen in decades. He's been trying to expose them for the past year and so far has only made a handful of arrests and followed even less good leads. His team, nicknamed The Knights, are the best officers in the business but with Arthur making little progress they're in danger of losing everything. And don't even get him started on what's going on between him and Merlin.





	

**Author's Note:**

  * For [CariadWinter](https://archiveofourown.org/users/CariadWinter/gifts).



> Based on this prompt: Merthur Slash. Arthur is a Detective Inspector investigating the most powerful crime syndicate in London. He's neck deep in murder, prostitution, drugs, gun running, dirty inspectors, etc. He doesn't know how deep the rabbit hole goes or how high up the ladder the corruption stretches. The syndicate has had someone watching him for a while now - be it a partner, a neighbor, a friend (dealer's choice) - and Arthur's never had anything too damaging in his possession. He's made a few arrests here and there, but it's only ever been bones that the syndicate themselves have thrown him. Now, by a twist of fate, he's struck gold and the syndicate needs him stopped before he unravels their whole operation. Cue the (partner, neighbor, friend) being given the order to take Arthur out. Only, this person actually cares for Arthur and killing him isn't as easy as they'd thought it would be. Suddenly things are all topsy-turvy, there are feelings involved, and pulling the trigger means destroying them both.
> 
> I hope you like this, I took the gist of it and changed it a bit with Arthur working for his father in actively capturing all sorcerer's, it's similar to your prompt except with magic being the main 'crime' and Camelot being modern day London :)

Arthur threw the file down on the desk and growled with frustration. He'd spent the last two weeks following up on what he'd thought was a promising lead only to find out that the whole thing had been a jealous attempt at payback as a result of a lover's quarrel. He was going to have to remind Gwaine what taking a thorough statement actually meant.

He threw himself back into his chair, one hand rising to his head in an attempt to soothe the blinding headache he could feel coming on and the other clenching into a fist on the desk as he fought not to slam it against a wall. Again.

His father had assigned him to the department just over a year ago. It was supposed to have been a minor investigation, a quick case to prove he was capable of following in his father's footsteps. There had been reports of an organization hell bent on building a rebellion, destroying everything Camelot stood for and bringing back magic to a country where it had been outlawed for the entirety of Arthur's life.

The investigation had turned out to be a lot more serious than both himself and Uther had originally thought. Dead ends, secret meetings, misinformation, no eye witnesses and not even a whisper of a members name had almost driven Arthur mad. They only had one word that kept cropping up but they didn't know whether it was a codename, an actual name or even an object. Emrys. That was it. The lack of solid evidence in the presence of such overwhelming hints at sinister activity was what worried him the most.

It was like chasing a ghost.

He kept telling himself that someone was bound to slip up, make just one mistake, and he'd finally be able to bring them down but so far absolutely nothing. His father was getting more paranoid by the hour.

There was a knock on his office door and Arthur raised his head and glared at it. He tried to school his features into a mask of indifference but he knew the anger he was feeling at his continued failure couldn't be smoothed over.

"Come in." Arthur yelled, wincing as the volume of his voice reverberated harshly inside his head.

Gwen opened the door, smiling wearily, another dozen files tucked against her chest.

"The files you asked for," she nodded at her hands as she held them out towards him, "there's a few new details that Lancelot managed to dig up but nothing significant. Leon and Elyan think they might have a lead on Emrys, but they don't know whether it's a witness or a member so they'll debrief when they know more. Percy is heading back out to check on that woman's lead from last week, take some more statements, fact check, the usual, and Gwaine wanted me to tell you that he's getting the drinks when we all go out this weekend." Gwen rolled her eyes as Arthur snorted.

"I guess that's as close to an apology as I'm going to get from him." 

"It's Gwaine." Gwen offered, as if that explained everything.

"He should know how to do his job properly." Arthur argued.

"He's not the only one who believed the information." Gwen reminded gently.

"His lead, his responsibility."

Gwen grimaced but dropped the argument. "Everyone needs a break. We're all under a lot of pressure, especially you. Mistakes are bound to happen."

"We can't afford to make those mistakes and we definitely can't afford to take time off. If Gwaine can't handle it then he should leave."

Arthur met Gwen's eyes harshly. He knew he was being hard on her, hard on them all, and somewhere in the back of his mind he recognized that he was substituting Gwaine for words he'd been telling himself for the last 6 months but he couldn't afford any weakness. Not from his team and not from himself.

Gwen nodded, shooting him a strained smile and walking towards the door. She reached back to close the door behind her, looking at him once more. "Morgana offered her services again, I think you should consider it." She shut the door before waiting for his reply.

Arthur slumped forward onto his desk, pushing away the new files and hating everything about his life.

He doubted Morgana's private investigating skills would be able to help considering her normal clientele were nothing more than cheating spouses and suspicious partners but he was forced to admit that his options were looking less and less promising by the minute.

He'd already said no almost weekly since he'd first started and it was getting harder and harder to keep saying it the longer the case dragged on. She was going to be unbearable if he gave in but his pride meant nothing if she could actually help.

Arthur resigned himself to the end of another unproductive day and set about organizing his desk. After fifteen minutes he gave up, shoved a few files in his briefcase and headed out of his office. 

He nodded to Leon and Gwen as he passed through on his way to the exit. Gwaine was no doubt in one of the training rooms, a convenient reason for avoiding him, not that Arthur had the energy for a confrontation anyway.

His eyes flickered to the clock in his car as he started the engine and pulled out of the parking garage. It was almost 8pm, the earliest he'd left the office for at least a month. It took him less time than usual to get home and Arthur briefly entertained the idea that his luck was finally looking up. That idea went to hell as soon as he opened the door to his flat.

He often wondered why he'd allowed Merlin to move in with him. Their friendship had gotten off to the worst start possible when Merlin had somehow managed to dump an entire pot of, thankfully cold, coffee all over him the first day they'd met. 

Admittedly, it had obviously been an accident but Arthur hadn't been having a great day considering he'd already been two months into the investigation with exactly zero to show for it when Merlin had decided Arthur obviously needed some kind of wake up call.

It probably hadn't helped that Arthur, instead of acknowledging Merlin's stumbling apology, had launched into a tirade about incompetent tossers. It had taken Merlin all but two seconds to start a blistering attack on over-privileged stuck up arseholes and from there it had escalated into both of them getting lifetime bans from Starbucks. Arthur still blamed Merlin entirely.

The radio blasted out a song that sounded like a dying seagull being slowly plucked to death as Merlin danced badly in the kitchen and cooked what smelled like a car tyre.

Arthur wrinkled his nose in disgust, unsure whether the sight or the smell was worse on this occasion. He decided it was a tie. He also decided he absolutely did not find any of it adorable.

Merlin made what was probably supposed to be a spin but more accurately depicted a sort of aborted flail which evidently brought Arthur into his line of sight because Merlin made the most ridiculous half scream and threw himself backwards into one of the cupboards.

"You prat!" Merlin shouted, rubbing his hip and scowling at Arthur. "I told you not to sneak up on me anymore!"

"I didn't sneak up on you! It's not my fault you can't hear anything over that damn racket," he gestured towards the radio in annoyance, 'Though it's a wonder you can miss hearing anything considering your ears." It was an old insult but it never failed to piss Merlin off.

"You're not usually back until 11, asshole." Merlin grumbled, turning around to check on whatever monstrosity he'd cooked. He turned off the gas before whining and dumping the contents of the pan in the bin. "You made me ruin dinner!"

"It was ruined before I got here!" Arthur scoffed, dropping his briefcase on the couch and heading towards his bedroom to change, ignoring the look of indignance on Merlin's face.

"You're going to have to pay for a takeaway now!" Merlin shouted at his retreating back.

"Like hell I am!" Arthur yelled, fighting the grin that was starting to take over his face. Somehow arguing with Merlin never failed to shake him out of a bad mood. 

He heard Merlin laugh, no doubt already leafing through the various takeaway menus stuffed in one of their kitchen drawers.

Arthur changed into a pair of sweat pants and exchanged his tight fitting shirt for a baggy t-shirt with 'Sarcasm Loading' emblazoned on the front. He didn't know how Merlin's clothes kept finding their way into his wardrobe but at the moment he couldn't be bothered to correct it.

He walked back towards the kitchen, heading towards the fridge and pulling out two beers.

Merlin was laid across their sofa, flicking through TV channels and humming to himself.

"Move or be moved." Arthur said, looking down at him.

Merlin huffed but sat up, moving to one side of the sofa and rolling his eyes.

Arthur passed him one of the beers then sat down, sinking into the sofa in barely restrained relief. He couldn't remember the last time he'd sat down and actually attempted to relax.

"Pizza's on its way."

"Did you…"

"Yes."

"With…"

"Obviously."

"And…"

"No, I didn't forget the mile long list of minute topping variations you somehow think amounts to an actual pizza." Merlin smiled, fond exasperation leaking into his tone.

Arthur shoved him. "Idiot."

"Clotpole."

"Still not a word." Arthur reminded him, raising his beer to his lips and tilting his head back.

"Still not a pizza." Merlin retorted.

Arthur chuckled and Merlin grinned back, eyes flicking down to the words on his t-shirt.

"Are you wearing my shirt?"

"You need to pay more attention to where you put your stuff."

"If you did your own washing instead of expecting a servant to do it for you this wouldn't happen."

"If you were a competent servant you wouldn't make this type of mistake." Arthur countered.

"I'm not your servant."

"I know, you're too incompetent." Arthur grinned.

"I can't believe I live with you."

"Oh, please, you love me."

"I love your apartment," Merlin corrected, "you're like the one blemish on an otherwise perfect creation."

"Liar."

Arthur snatched the remote from Merlin's hand, holding it out of reach as Merlin dived forward to get it back.

"You picked the food, I'm picking the movie."

"You picked last time!" Merlin whined, but sat back anyway, already deciding to admit defeat.

"That's because I'm better at picking obviously." Arthur almost, almost, stuck his tongue out. His urge to become a petulant five year old was always tested when he was around Merlin.

Merlin grumbled under his breath and Arthur took that as an agreement.

Arthur eventually settled on Dragonheart, beaming in triumph as he turned towards Merlin.

"Shut up." Merlin said.

Arthur tossed the remote onto the coffee table and settled back into the sofa.

He might tease and snipe at Merlin daily but he had to admit that he was the only bright spot in his days at the moment. He dreaded to think how much worse he'd have been if Merlin wasn't there at the end of everyday, even if only for a few minutes. It was like a release and Arthur almost recoiled at the idea of giving it up.

They hadn't had time to sit around together lately and it was nice to get back to the familiarity of their nights in.

The last few times had been different though. There was an undercurrent of something Arthur had been trying to decipher. 

Looks that were held for a few seconds longer, laughs that felt deeper, touches that he swore lingered.

Arthur didn't know whether the stress of the case was making him see things that weren't there or whether their friendship was beginning to progress into something else.

He sometimes felt like doing something about it but the fear of being wrong held him back. He couldn't stand that type of failure nor could he risk losing Merlin if he was imagining things.

It's not like he didn't understand that his feelings for his best friend sometimes stepped over into territory that suggested more. Arthur knew he felt more than just friendship but with everything going on he couldn't risk ruining the one thing that was still working.

He tried to focus on the movie, smiling as the characters went through the motions of sword fighting. He sometimes felt that he was born in the wrong time. He should have been a Knight or maybe a King.

His headache was starting to flare up again and he rubbed uselessly at his temples, closing his eyes against the light.

He was considering getting up to hunt down some aspirin when he felt a tug on his arm.

"Come on." Merlin said, grabbing a cushion from behind him and propping it up against the armrest.

"What?" Arthur replied, confused.

"You'll be a right grump if that headache hits and I'd rather not put up with you when you're in a mood." He patted the cushion and jerked his head as if Arthur should know what any of that meant.

"What?" Arthur repeated, not understanding in the slightest.

Merlin sighed like Arthur was the most oblivious idiot on the planet and he had no idea why he bothered trying to communicate with him.

"I'm offering you a head massage, you prat."

"Why?"

"Because you need one and I happen to be very good at them."

"I doubt that."

"Then I'll get to enjoy proving you wrong." Merlin said, pulling on Arthur's arm again, more forcefully this time.

Arthur allowed Merlin to manoeuvre him onto the pillow, belatedly realizing that he was now effectively laid in Merlin's lap. Arthur had a moment of panicked awkwardness in which he had no idea where to put the rest of his limbs before mentally shouting at himself to get a grip and allowing Merlin to position him.

Arthur shuffled a bit then glanced up a Merlin.

Merlin's ears had pinked and there was a slight blush to his cheeks but he looked back, determined.

Arthur didn't know where to look so he settled for closing his eyes and waiting.

The anticipation was an unusual mix of worry and excitement, before Merlin finally pressed the tips of his fingers to Arthur's temples.

It was strange at first, like they were both holding their breaths, on the edge of something. Then Merlin started humming softly and Arthur began to relax.

Arthur grudgingly admitted to himself that Merlin was actually rather good. The soft circles he was drawing into his skin instantly began to ease the build-up of stressed pressure. He felt a slight tingling sensation but decided that was probably the beer. Arthur hadn't had any alcohol for a while having refused invitations to their friends weekly night out for the last few weeks.

Soon Merlin's fingers began to move towards the centre of his forehead, keeping up the same circular movement that had Arthur ready to start drifting off to sleep. He was on the cusp of it when something started to feel different.

Merlin's hands began tugging softly through Arthur's hair, stroking down the sides of his head, his wrist occasionally brushing Arthur's jaw.

Arthur felt his breathing pick up slightly and the nervous thud of his heart began to beat faster.

What at first had felt soothing now felt almost teasing, playful, enticing.

It was ridiculous, but Arthur was sure he wasn't imaging it.

Arthur opened his eyes to find Merlin looking down at him, smiling warmly.

"Better?" Merlin asked.

Arthur's mouth felt dry and he had to clear his throat to reply, "Yes."

"Told you." Merlin laughed, smug.

"Shut up." Arthur said, bringing up one of his hands with the intent to shove Merlin's away. He closed his hand around one of Merlin's wrists, stilling him, but he couldn't find the will to actually push it away.

They locked eyes, emotions Arthur couldn't name flashing rapidly across Merlin's face.

"Arthur?" It felt like Merlin had just asked the most important question of his life.

"Merlin." Arthur answered, boldly, hoping it was answer enough. He wasn't sure what made him suddenly feel certain but he was resolved to meet every challenge Merlin laid out.

Merlin scanned Arthur's face, looking for something Arthur didn't know how to let him find, before he nodded, lips quirking in amusement.

Merlin tilted his chin down, bringing his face closer to Arthur's and slowly closing the distance between them. 

Arthur pushed up slightly, letting Merlin come to him but making clear he was ready for whatever Merlin did next.

Their lips were temptingly close to each other's when Arthur's earlier assessment of his luck being on a considerable downward spiral proved completely accurate.

The doorbell rang and Merlin jerked back at the same time Arthur threw himself up into a sitting position. Arthur's head dropped forwards into his knees as he felt Merlin sigh and stand up to get the door.

Arthur couldn't hear anything for a few seconds over the wild beat of his heart and the frantic thoughts of 'what the fuck just happened?!' wizzing through his head.

He dimly registered the front door shut and shook his head, preparing to put the last half hour behind him. 

He heard the padding of Merlin's feet walk back towards the sofa and swung his legs down to turn back towards the TV. 

Arthur kept his eyes fixed on the screen, registering Merlin placing the food on the coffee table in his peripheral but not turning to acknowledge it. He needed a few more seconds to compose himself. 

He felt Merlin sit down next to him before a tug once more on his arm sent him spinning towards him. He didn't even have time to look up properly before Merlin's hands roughly grabbed his face and Merlin's lips crashed against his own.

Arthur's body caught up long before his mind did and immediately responded to the urgency of Merlin's touches.

It was frantic, wild. A push and pull but such a glorious give and take that Arthur worried for a second that his heart would fly right out of his chest in an effort to get closer to Merlin's.

It felt like hours but their kisses gradually shortened and slowed until it was just a casual brush, a small nip, a shared breath between them.

The kisses ended by some unspoken agreement and their foreheads came to rest against each others, Merlin's hands still grasping Arthur's face and Arthur's clutched achingly against Merlin's shirt.

Arthur's eyes were closed and his breathing harsh as he fought for some semblance of control. His proximity to Merlin was wrecking havoc on his ability to think clearly but he couldn't bear to put even an inch more distance between them.

He felt Merlin's thumbs rub gently against his cheeks and pulled back to look at him.

Merlin had his eyes open and his smile immediately ruined any ounce of control Arthur thought he'd built. It was dazzling, infectious, so perfect that Arthur felt his own grin stretch ridiculously in response.

"Are you hungry?" Merlin asked, still smiling and looking like he'd just won something. 

"Not for pizza." Arthur's response came before he even had time to think.

Merlin laughed loudly, head thrown back drawing Arthur's gaze to his throat before he brought his face forward once more, his hands gliding down to loosen and wrap around Arthur's.

"Good answer." Merlin pulled Arthur up with him and made towards his bedroom, Arthur following in a happy daze.

As soon as they were in the room Merlin spun back towards him and captured his lips once again. 

It was messy this time, more urgent, almost like Merlin was trying to pull Arthur into him.

Arthur was content to let Merlin lead, his hands struggling to decide where to put themselves. He wanted to touch Merlin everywhere at once and his pants were becoming more and more uncomfortable by the second.

Merlin's mouth moved from Arthurs lips to his jaw and then he began to bite and lick slowly down Arthur's neck causing him to tilt his head and allow Merlin more access.

Merlin's kisses were almost drugging and that same tingling sensation Arthur had experienced on the sofa was back, growing in intensity the longer they touched.

The pace had slowed once more but Arthur found himself impatient. It felt like he'd been waiting forever and even a few more seconds would be too long.

He pushed Merlin away, then immediately stepped forward again, his hands grabbing at Merlin's shirt and yanking it upwards. As soon as it was off Merlin did the same to Arthur's (Merlin's some part of Arthur's brain shouted) and then they were both kissing again, warm chests pressed against each other and hands wandering over as much skin as they could reach.

Merlin started pulling Arthur towards the bed and dropped back on to it as soon as his knees hit the frame. They parted and stared at each other, breaths loud and frantic.

Arthur hooked his fingers into the fabric at his hips quickly shoving his sweats and underwear to the floor and stepping out of them. Merlin just watched, eyes darting everywhere at once, eventually fixating on Arthur's cock, hard and leaking. Merlin let out a groan, his eyes blown wide.

Arthur walked the remaining step between them as Merlin shuffled backwards to make room, pushing down his own trousers and flinging them somewhere on to the floor.

They took a second to stare at each other once more, finally naked with nothing between them.

Arthur thought he should feel nervous or unsure but when his eyes met Merlin's there was nothing but acceptance and encouragement.

Then Arthur broke and closed the remaining distance, pushing himself onto Merlin until there wasn't an inch between them.

The friction felt fantastic as they rubbed against each other, kissing deeply, tongues sliding against each other like they'd done it a thousand times before.

Merlin's hand glided down between them and gripped Arthur's cock, stroking him firmly and causing Arthur to groan against Merlin's mouth.

Arthur wrenched his lips away from Merlin's and started to suck at his neck instead, biting then soothing away the sting as Merlin panted into his ear.

They rocked against each other and Arthur jerked gracelessly as Merlin stroked him faster.

Arthur knew he was mumbling nonsense but he couldn't think long enough to control his words.

He felt hot everywhere and the tingling was becoming almost unbearable yet the added intensity only increased his desire. He'd never felt so lost yet so anchored to another person.

He felt his orgasm rush through him and dimly realized that he'd been moaning Merlin's name as he did so before he collapsed forward, limbs trembling uselessly.

He felt Merlin's hand stroke through his hair and managed to raise his head enough to look at him. Merlin was panting and grinning and Arthur's muddled brain finally caught on to the fact that he had something very important to take care of.

Arthur grinned, reaching a hand up to cup the back of Merlin's head and pulling him in for another blinding kiss.

Arthur slowly began to work his way from Merlin's lips and down his chest, alternating between kisses and bites and thoroughly enjoying the sounds Merlin couldn't stop making.

He reached his hand down to grip Merlin, sliding his hand teasingly up and down his cock and squeezing the base as Merlin rocked into his hand and arched up in frustration.

Arthur chuckled and positioned his head between Merlin's thighs, his strokes getting faster and faster then slowing as he waited for Merlin to look down at him.

"If you don't keep going I'm going to kill you." Merlin gasped, hands fisting the sheets and hips thrusting upwards into Arthur's grip.

"Patience, Merlin."

"I've been patient since the day I met you, you ass."

Arthur blinked in surprise, "Really?"

"Unfortunately, I even find asshole you attractive. If we hadn't have gotten thrown out for that argument I'm reasonably sure we would have when I bent you over one of the tables." Merlin grinned, cheekily. His eyes were alight with taunting mirth.

"Fuck." Arthur was getting hard again just imagining it.

"I'd appreciate it if you would, yes."

"Merlin, do you have any idea how long I've wanted this? You've been driving me crazy."

"Then we're even. I haven't been able to think of anything other than you since we first met."

"Fuck." Arthur repeated, still half stunned.

"If you're going to keep repeating yourself, you may as well start putting that mouth of yours to better use. Sucking my -nghn," Merlin gasped and hissed, arching once more.

Arthur slowly sucked Merlin's cock, running his tongue along the underside of it as he pulled back then swirling the tip as he pushed back down.

Merlin moved one of his hands from the sheets and gripped Arthur's hair, pulling desperately but allowing Arthur to set the pace.

Arthur was beginning to realize that Merlin's fingers and their presence in his hair was quickly becoming a kink that was probably going to get him into trouble in the future.

He relaxed his throat and swallowed as best he could, letting Merlin thrust into his mouth, forcing himself to breathe through his nose to hold off his gag reflex.

It didn't take long for Merlin to still, tensing up and releasing a low groan as he spilled down Arthur's throat and sunk back into the mattress, trembling and gasping for breath.

Arthur tried to swallow as much as he could, allowing Merlin to ride out his orgasm before pulling away and kissing back up Merlin's body.

When he reached Merlin's mouth he surged forward, bringing him into a dirty kiss and savouring the moan Merlin couldn't help but let escape as he tasted himself on Arthur's tongue.

Arthur pulled back eventually and collapsed next to him. Both of them were still breathing shakily and Arthur wondered whether he'd ever actually manage to catch his breath again.

He rolled on to his side, tangling his legs with Merlin's and resting his head against his shoulder. He brought his hand up to rest over Merlin's heart and closed his eyes.

He felt Merlin turn slightly before a blanket was thrown over both of them.

He wanted to open his eyes again so he could talk about what had just happened and what it meant but the exhaustion from his lack of sleep and the pleasant buzz he was still experiencing pulled him under.

There was plenty of time to deal with the aftermath tomorrow.

***

Arthur woke up, pleasantly warm and loose limbed. He couldn't remember the last time he'd woken up so relaxed.

He was still curled around Merlin who was asleep and breathing deeply.

Arthur took a moment to study him and allow his feelings to wash over himself full force. He'd spent so long ignoring what was between them, making excuses for why it wasn't there, that it felt freeing to finally admit that it was happening.

Arthur allowed himself another few minutes before he started to feel slightly weird about watching Merlin sleep, despite the fact it couldn't be helped when Merlin looked so captivating when he was this vulnerable.

He moved away slowly, careful not to wake Merlin up. He rolled out of bed, pulled on his sweat pants from the night before, forgoing his underwear and a shirt, and padded into the bathroom to use the toilet.

When he'd finished and cleaned himself up a bit he walked back through the bedroom, forcing himself not to linger too long on gazing at Merlin again, and walked into the kitchen intent on making them both breakfast in bed.

Arthur was fully aware that he was already way too invested as he cooked bacon and scrambled some eggs. Part of him knew that he was probably (completely) in love with Merlin and while that scared him he was also immensely relieved that he could finally do something about it and that it was at least, in part, reciprocated.

He wasn't looking forward to the awkward 'what are we' conversation but he knew the aftermath would be more than worth it and it felt like his life had finally started to fall a little more into place.

He'd just finished plating everything up when the phone on the kitchen counter went off, indicating a new text.

Arthur glanced over, realizing it was Merlin's phone and picked it up to take it with him into the bedroom.

He hadn't really meant to read it but looking down one word caught his eye.

He froze as his mind caught up and everything clicked.

His heart shattered about five seconds later.

He heard a shuffling from Merlin's bedroom but was unable to react even as he realized Merlin must have woken up.

Arthur watched as the bedroom door was yanked open and Merlin scrambled into the kitchen, his face breaking into relief as he saw Arthur.

"Oh, good. I thought for a minute that you'd snuck out and you were regretting what happened last night but then I smelled the bacon and I knew...," Merlin trailed off, finally picking up on Arthur's tense stance, "Arthur? Are you okay? What happened?" Merlin made towards him and Arthur couldn't help but flinch back.

Hurt flashed across Merlin's face but he kept his eyes on Arthur's.

"What's wrong? Arthur, you're scaring me." Merlin's hands flexed at his sides as if he wanted to reach out.

Arthur opened his mouth to speak but couldn't. He cleared his throat to start again but the only word he could manage to force past his lips was, "Emrys."

It was like a curtain had been ripped back. Merlin's entire demeanour changed, became harder, more cautious.

"I don't know what you're talking about."

Arthur heard the lie now he was ready for it. He'd always thought Merlin was the most open person he'd ever met. He'd been so sure Merlin _couldn't_ lie. Now he knew to be looking for one he grimaced. Five minutes ago would have missed it. He wondered how many more he'd missed in his ignorance.

"Liar." Arthur almost hissed, pain lancing through him as he remembered the teasing way he'd said it last night. 

Merlin flinched at the harshness in Arthur's tone but his eyes remained steady.

They stared at each other, barely breathing. Waiting. Arthur wanted to scream at how similar yet how completely opposite and wrong every word and look was matching the last twelve hours.

Merlin seemed to decide something, softening slightly and taking a step towards him, hands reaching out.

Arthur stepped back, glaring hard. "Don't you fucking dare."

"I can explain." Merlin raised his hands further, pleading.

"You're involved with them aren't you?" Arthur didn't even need to tell him who 'them' were. He'd moaned about his case countless times. A sharper pain pierced him. He'd been so stupid, so naive. Merlin had probably laughed over how easy it was to dupe him.

"It's not what you think. You have to trust me, Arthur."

"Trust you? How the fuck am I supposed to trust you when you've been lying to me since we met!" Arthur shouted, moving forward in his anger. "Oh, god," he whispered as he thought back to when they'd met, "it was all a set up, wasn't it? You were a plant. A spy."

Merlin opened his mouth, anger flashing through his eyes, before he slumped slightly, rocking back. "I was supposed to watch you. That's it. It wasn't to gather information or gain your trust or anything like that, I swear. I was just meant to watch. I wasn't even supposed to make contact, but you know me, I'm too clumsy." Merlin attempted lightness, his voice hopeful, urging Arthur to share the joke.

"I thought I knew you." Arthur bit out.

"You do know me! None of it was a lie, Arthur. We aren't a lie." Merlin argued.

"It was all a lie, there is no we!" Arthur exploded, "You're one of them! You want to kill my father! Kill me!"

"Of course I don't! That's not what any of this is about, that's not why I'm here!"

Arthur ignored him. "So what was the plan then? Get close to me, hold me hostage to lure out my father? Or were you just going to murder me and hope the grief finished him off too?"

"You're being ridiculous! Our only goal is to stop Uther from persecuting those with magic. We don't...I don't want him dead. You have to see that what he's doing is wrong! You've told me that sometimes you disagree with your father. I know that once you realize what's really going on you'll understand."

"So your plan was to manipulate me then! Make me switch sides. You'd have me turn against my own father." Arthur seethed.

"I'd have you see the truth!" Merlin yelled. "We're people. We're hunted and we're tortured and we're killed."

"We?" Arthur stumbled back, realization rushing through his body and making him dizzy. "You have magic?" As soon as Arthur said it he knew it to be true. It was obvious. Of course Merlin had magic.

"Yes." Merlin confessed, his face becoming more and more weary the longer Arthur stared.

"Is that why I feel the way I feel about you? Did you make me fall in...," Arthur swallowed, shaking his head, "Did you do this?" He gestured between them, embarrassment and shame swirling in his gut. He'd been so, so stupid. So blind.

"I can't make you feel anything you don't feel yourself. I would never use my magic on you, Arthur."

"How am I supposed to believe you?" Arthur could sense he was close to pleading. It was eating him up inside. He wanted so badly to just believe everything Merlin said, to go back to this morning and everything it had promised. But he couldn't be weak.

"I love you, Arthur. I'm so fucking in love with you. I would never hurt you and I will never hurt your father or our friends." Merlin said, eyes boring into Arthur's as if he could force the truth of his words to register. "But I also won't let you or your father or our friends hurt my people. I want to protect you all and the only way to do that is to stop Uther and bring magic back to Camelot." He finished, stepping closer and reaching towards him.

Arthur felt so tired, so beaten. He didn't know who or what to believe in anymore and he couldn't find the strength to push Merlin away.

Merlin's hands cupped Arthur's cheeks tentatively and Arthur closed his eyes. He wanted to cry at the sweetness he felt emanating from every part of Merlin's body. If this was magic making him feel like this he almost wanted to let it, let Merlin, have him.

"We can figure this out together. No one gets hurt, or manipulated, or killed. I'll tell you everything, I swear. Just please, please don't walk away." Merlin rested his forehead gently against Arthur's and breathed deeply.

Betrayal still thrummed harshly through Arthur's veins but his gut told him Merlin was being sincere. 

Arthur could believe that Merlin could lie to him to protect himself and others. He could believe he'd join a shady organization to put right what he felt was a terrible wrong. A wrong Arthur had often questioned himself, even before Merlin had come along. Hell, he knew his whole team had occasionally expressed discomfort at some of the cases they'd had, the people they'd arrested.

When Arthur searched his mind and his heart the one thing he couldn't truly believe was that Merlin was evil. Even the best actors, even the best spies, slipped, and Arthur had always been good at catching them.

He may have been blinded for the last year but Arthur's instincts had never let him down and his instincts were telling him that Merlin could be trusted.

Arthur sighed opening his eyes and allowing the tension he'd been holding to dissipate. He slowly brought his hands up to grip Merlin's wrists, pulling his head back slightly and holding Merlin's eyes.

"Okay. I believe you. I need you to tell me everything. No more lies, no more secrets. Then we're going to figure this out. Together."

Merlin smiled, his features losing some of their tension and his eyes filling with relief. 

Merlin leaned in, softly brushing his lips against Arthur's, a plea, a promise. "Together. I promise." Merlin pulled back and walked over to the cooker, emptying out the contents of their now ruined breakfast into the bin.

"But first, breakfast." Merlin smiled, an apology written on every corner of his face.

Arthur allowed a small huff of laughter to leave his lips before he rolled his eyes and joined him.

**Author's Note:**

> My only regret with this fic is that it's not as long as I would have liked, I joined quite a few exchanges over Christmas and probably overstretched myself but I'm fairly happy with this (I feel like this needs a part two to expand on it and have the whole Uther/Arthur + Merlin confrontation but my heads not in it yet so I'm probably gonna return to this at some point and add a second chapter but for now I think this ends okay) I've really enjoyed tackling one of your prompts and I hope you enjoy reading it!
> 
> Title is from the song Paris by The Chainsmokers which I highly recommend people listen to.
> 
> (Also this is the first M/M sex scene I have ever written so I'm pretty nervous about it and I hope I've done it at least some type of justice and not butchered it completely! Any concrit is much appreciated!)


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